Friday, May 20, 2011

Celluloid Philosophers - Shaun And Ed




Ed: Any zombies out there?
Shaun: Don't say that!
Ed: What?
Shaun: That!
Ed: What?
Shaun: The zed-word. Don't say it!
Ed: Why not?
Shaun: Because it's ridiculous!
Ed: All right... are there any out there, though?
[looking out of the letter-box, he sees an empty street]
Shaun: I can't see any. Maybe it's not as bad as all that.
[he turns his head and sees a pack of zombies]
Shaun: Oh, no, there they are.

- Shaun (Simon Pegg) / Ed (Nick Frost) - Shaun of the Dead (2004)


Bonus:

Ed: What's the plan then?
Shaun: Right.
[cuts to dream sequence]
Shaun: We take Pete's car, we drive over to Mum's, we go in, take care of Philip - "I'm so sorry, Philip" - then we grab Mum, we go over to Liz's place, hole up, have a cup of tea and wait for this whole thing to blow over.
Ed: Why have we got to go to Liz's?
Shaun: Because we do.
Ed: But she dumped you!
Shaun: I have to know if she's all right!
Ed: Why?
Shaun: Because I love her!
Ed: All right... gayyy... I'm not staying there, though.
Shaun: Why not?
Ed: If we hole up, I wanna be somewhere familiar, I wanna know where the exits are, and I wanna be allowed to smoke.
Shaun: Okay.
[cuts to dream sequence again]
Shaun: We take Pete's car, go round Mum's, go in, deal with Philip - "Sorry, Philip!" - grab Mum, go to Liz's, pick her up, bring her back here, have a cup of tea and wait for this whole thing to blow over.
Ed: Perfect!
Shaun: No, no, no, no, no, wait, we can't bring her back here.
Ed: Why not?
Shaun: Well, it's not really safe, is it?
Ed: Yeah, look at the state of it.
Shaun: Where's safe? Where's familiar?
Ed: Where can I smoke?
[Shaun and Ed pause then slowly make a realisation]
Shaun: [cuts to dream sequence a third time] Take car. Go to Mum's. Kill Phil - "Sorry." - grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. How's that for a slice of fried gold?
Ed: Yeah, boyyyeee!
[Shaun and Ed clang their weapons together]



Shaun: They still out there?
[Ed checks, revealing two zombies scratching at the window]
Ed: Yeah. What you think we should do?
Shaun: Have a sit down?

See Also: Shaun of the Dead Uniform T-Shirt / Shaun of the Dead 12-Inch Talking Action Figure / PAUL DVD News And Simon Pegg Book Signings / SHAUN OF THE DEAD In 60 Seconds Scott Pilgrim Style / Paul (2011)(Universal) /Univerasl Picks Up the Tab For PAUL Roadtrip / Shaun of the Dead - Bash 'Em In The Head - T-Shirt / Celluloid Philosophers - Shaun / Hot Fuzz (2007)(Rogue Pictures) / Star Trek (2009)(Paramount) / Pegg Makes His Portrayal Of Scotty A Tribute To Doohan / Simon Pegg Reaches Out To Star Trek Fans / Has Simon Pegg Burned His Star Wars Bridge? / Is Edgar Wright Planning A Gorgo Remake? / Pegg, Wright, And Frost Set To Cause The Worlds End

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